Hard to even talk about!

I cant believe I am even going to talk about this but I want to be able to look back and see how far our family as grown and tell everyone see we did it!

About a month ago I called Bill at work and said I made an appointment for a life coach that we have used in the past just a couple of times. We haven’t seen him in about 4 years. We went to him to talk about how to deal emotionally with the health issues with Tanner. At one point we were told he has leukemia (which he didn’t they got the test results mixed up with another child that did have it) Then he had a blood disorder if he started to bleed he wouldn’t stop. Bill was kind of confused when I told him that. He said I thought we were doing good. We are honey but I think it would be good to be able to talk to someone like once a month just to get the stress out into the open and hopefully prevent us having any issues. It is very easy for us to grow apart. Its like a 90 percent divorce rate with parents that have special needs. Its like 5 percent divorce rate with parents of multiples. So we only have 5 percent to even make it! LOL

So we had a nice family that has helped us out alot of the past year watch all the kids for us to be able to go. We get there fill out paperwork and then sit down. He asked why are you here. I answered quickly and gave him what our lives have been like and what we have gone thru the past year. I started crying ( I am a very emotionally person) and saying I just want to give everything what they need! The life coach replied and said I hate to say this but you need to give the quints up for adoption. Bill replied  that is not an option. Lifecoach responded its not what you want but what is best for all your children. You possible cant give each child what you need. It just plain and simple number wise. I was balling at this point, thinking about what we have over come in the past year. Lifecoach said I worked for the state and there are alot of people that would love to have kids. There are different programs out there, you could even pick out the parents and still have a relationship with them. If you don’t your family will crash and burn. She will end up being in a mentally institution, not one person can take care of 8 kids  while you are at work. At this point I am surprised that Bill hasn’t hit this guy in his mouth. I replied I cant give these babies up. What message is this to the older kids. He responded the older kids would understand and the quints when they got older would respect me for wanting more for them. He said OK you cant give them up, we will look at another option but just have in the back of your mind it probably wont work and you will need to think about giving them up.  We walked out and I just lost it. Someone thinks that I am not doing a good job. This made me question myself as a parent. Bill got so mad at me why would you let this guy that has never been around our family get you upset. As a woman this is hard to hear about your family that I have worked so hard for! This bothered me for a couple of weeks but now I know I am doing the best thing for our family and that’s all I can do! I will not give up my children and I will work as hard as I can and do the best job that I can possibly do!

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About quintsofkentuckiana

Hello and Welcome to the Kessinger-Clark Family! My name is Christy and my wonderful husbands name is Bill. We currently have three children. Ty is 9 yrs old, Tayleigh is 5 yrs old, and Tanner is 2 yrs old. Tanner has Down Syndrome but is the light of our family! My husband works as a IT network administrator and I quit working as a HR Manager when Tanner was 6 months old due to him being the hospital so many times. We decided to have just one more child but found out we are expecting QUINTUPLETS. No we did not do invetro or see an RE doctor. I had my IUD taken out, took some medication that was herbal and over the counter, and medicine for enlarged ovaries. But the medication was at the lowest doseage. Now we are trying to figure out how we are going to manage such a large family!
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8 Responses to Hard to even talk about!

  1. Alicia says:

    Oh my word! I can’t believe that guy said that to you! You are doing a great job! (I’ve seen you in Chick-Fil-A so I know! :))

    • Wendi says:

      Christy & Bill, hang in there… and I know for sure I could not be able to handle all that both of you do on a daily basis. I think the life coach at this point would be pressing charges against me for assult and battery. I am not a physical person but honestly can’t say how I would handle that situation. Special needs children make things even more challanging. You are right about the divorce rate I have seen it all to well.

  2. Angie Bischoff says:

    Wow, what a jerk!
    If I remember right you guys attend SECC (I started following your blog after reading about your family in the Outlook). They have peer counselors there that were a wonderful help to me earlier this year. I have a 2 year son with Down syndrome and last winter I was going through a lot of “mommy guilt” over how he was progressing and how I was handling “things” (therapy, doctors appointment, just plain ole being overwhelmed). I called and they set me up with a counselor and we talked about my “issues” and within a month or so I was feeling better. There was never any judgement felt and I instantly felt at ease talking with this other mom. I do believe that they have marriage mentors also which would be for both of you to talk with someone. I’ll leave my email and feel free to contact me if you want to talk “mom to mom”.

  3. Sherri Peercy says:

    Unbelievable! And this guy is supposed to be a Life Coach? I hope you’ve fired him by now! – There’s not enough words to explain how terrible I feel for you and your husband having to sit through listening to this guy! You have no option in feeling overwhelmed daily at the responsibility of raising all eight of your children. But God is BIG and I know you have faith that He will pull you through. You are doing a fabulous job as a mother and anyone who reads your blog can see how very much you love each of your kids. Just take one day at a time, that’s all you can do. In the meanwhile, I promise to pray for you and your family!

  4. Kim Brooks says:

    In my words of wisdom: screw him. He needs another profession IMO.

    • Kim Brooks says:

      Sorry I got ticked and hit send to quick lol…You guys have done far better with 8 than I feel like I have with just 1 almost 14yro.

  5. Suzy says:

    I am in shock that anyone would tell you to give the quints away! I applaud you for taking measures to keep your marriage healthy, but this man is insane! I wonder if there are any professional institutions he is affiliated with that you could report him to? That sort of advice is the opposite of helpful, and — in my opinion — completely unacceptable!!!

    Keep up with me, Ted, and our Fab Four at http://four-by-two.blogspot.com.

  6. Linda says:

    You and your husband are a real inspiration. From what I have read, you have done a wonderful job this last year. I am sure that it is hard but with God’s help, you are doing managing better than a lot of people could. Keep up the great work, your children are thriving with your love.

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